Worksheet 1

 

“Generally speaking, there are two: Global and Personal Belief Systems. Global belief systems can be what the recovering addict believes the way society thinks and/or what people may have believed about him. Personal beliefs are stem from way back and have been conditioned in his way of thinking. Regardless, both of these viewpoints can and must be changed for the recovering addict to ever believe that he is an adequate person and has the ability to make better decisions. The other way of correcting the recovering addict’s cognitive distortion is by focusing on what he considers to be pain and pleasure so he can learn to use pain as leverage to change and pleasure to motivate himself to achieve his goals and desires.” (Magomola, Conscience Behavior III, 2015).

 

STRATEGIES AND EXCERCISES

 

Making Decisions

• Take out a piece of paper and list the things that you are not happy about. For example:

• Boredom

• Lack of willingness to go to meetings

• Fear of talking to strangers

• Complacency regarding house-cleaning

• Noise around neighborhood

• Jealousy regarding partner/spouse

• Too much weight gain/loss

 

• Now, check what you have control over:

• Boredom√

• Lack of willingness to go to meetings

• Fear of talking to strangers√

• Complacency regarding house-cleaning√

• Noise around neighborhood

• Jealousy regarding partner/spouse

• Too much weight gain/loss√

 

• Questions to ask yourself on another piece of paper: what can you do about the things that you are unhappy about?

 

• Boredom√

  • Do I need more activities to entertain me?

  • Is what I am already doing lacking pleasure?

  • Have I outgrown such activities? If yes, change them or create a different routine for such activities.

 

• Fear of talking to strangers√

  • Do I feel like I have nothing to say? If yes, read and watch the news for something to discuss

 

• Complacency regarding house-cleaning√

  • Do I need to create a routine/schedule?

  • Do I need to wake up earlier or sleep later to clean the house?

  • Do I need to set aside a day on the weekend to spring clean

  • Do I need a maid? Can I afford one?

  • Do I find myself being sloppy and/or lazy to simply put things away?

 

• Too much weight gain/loss√

  • Can I afford a gym membership?

  • Can I afford a personal trainer?

  • What activities do I enjoy doing: running, speed-walking, weights, swimming, tennis/squash, aerobics, etc.

  • Create a schedule to fit in time to work out (preferably 45 minutes)

  • How is my eating?

  • Do I over or undereat?

  • Do I focus my diet on too many carbs, salts, fats, or sugar-based foods?

  • Do I eat enough vegetables, fruits, legumes, and protein?

  • Can I afford to eat better?

  • Buy better food

  • Throw away all junk food and ban yourself from eating take-away

 

• What is am I trying to achieve? Confidence, Personal achievement, Economic Power, Freedom, Self-Value, Recognition, Autonomy, etc.

 

• How urgent is the need to take such action? Low, Mild, Important, Priority?

 

• Now, look at your list and write only the ones that you consider priorities on another piece of paper

 

• List the priority in the preferred order

 

• List the element of the urgency.

 

Taking Action

• Write a list about what you are aware complacent about your life in a four heading formats:

ACADEMIC/

VOCATIONAL

SOCIAL LIFE/RELATIONSHIPS

SPIRITUAL

RECOVERY

 

 

 

 

 

•  Complete List under headings i.e.:

ACADEMIC/

VOCATIONAL

SOCIAL LIFE/RELATIONSHIPS

SPIRITUAL

RECOVERY

Go back to school

Attend social clubs

Attend church/synagogue/mosque/temple regularly

90/90

Study tertiary part-time/night school

Go for coffee with friends (i.e. from Fellowship)

Read from Bible/Qu’ran/Torah/ Bhagavid-Gita daily

Attend 3-4 meetings a week

Apply for employment

Start sports club/team

Create prayer and meditation ritual

Have sponsor

(daily contact)

Ask for raise

Register for activity group (knitting, language, art, dance)

Read from spiritual literature i.e. 12 Step books/self-help books

Start service work

 

• Write reasons for why you think you have become complacent. For example:

• Academic/Vocational: Fear of failing, not scheduling time to register, etc.

• Social Life/Relationships: Never looked up places, not schedule time in week, isolate at meetings

• Spiritual: Haven’t found a place of worship nearby, don’t have literature, don’t take Step 11 seriously

• Recovery: Lazy to commit to 90/90, have excuses for avoiding such meetings, don’t take responsibility for your recovery

 

• Write desires for what you want to accomplish:

• Academic/Vocational: Personal achievement, academic pride, good credentials for CV, promotions

• Social Life/Relationships: Create friendship circles, freedom from isolation, avoid boredom, develop intellectual/artistic/athletic skills, develop intimacy

• Spiritual: Find closer connection with Higher Power, learn about own and/or other religions, develop spiritual consciousness, build selfless consciousness

• Recovery: Avoid lapse and relapse behavior, connect with Fellowship, build confidence, develop public speaking skills, learn to commit to something and stick with it, learn more about addiction and recovery for leisure purposes

 

• Follow the directions instructed for ‘Making Decisions’

Breaking Patterns of Fear of Success

• Create a table in these categories:

 

•  

•  

•  

•  

•  

 

 

 

 

 

 

• Write a long-term goal list in the categories:

 

•  

•  

•  

•  

•  

Finish High School Diploma

Apply for a job in a job that you are most passionate about: Arts, Journalism, Sports, Business, Entrepreneur, etc.

Develop an romantic, intimate relationship

Begin artistic project: Photography, Music, Drawings, Paintings, Mosiacs, etc.

Plan vacation trips around South Africa (or local region) on an annual basis (or more frequent)

Register for Tertiary Education

Create a Vision Board (images of what you would like to see you doing, where you would like to be working, and the people you would like to surround yourself with)

Get a gym membership

Cook fanciful dishes on a weekly basis or more

Start a separate savings account for misc. events

Go to conferences or talks about subjects that will benefit your knowledge basis

Find mentors and develop a working relationships with them

Get a trainer and develop a fitness scheme

Build a library and/or DVD with favorite books and movies

Find out about hiking, mountain climbing, river-rafting clubs to join

 

• Ask yourself why you think you can’t achieve these accomplishments: i.e. lack of funds, lack of networking skills, shyness, lack of resources, unwillingness to research ideas, etc.

 

• Ask yourself why you were made to believe these achievements were impossible: i.e. your parents told you were unartistic/unatheltic, you were made to believe that you didn’t have the intellectual abilities, the people around you have thought as models never made it in their career, the environmental factors made you believe that you were disadvantaged, you lost your passion, etc.

 

• Revisit your goal list and ask yourself new questions about why you do think you could achieve these accomplishments: i.e. you have the self-discipline to work for them, you are self-motivated, you have the tenacity to do what needs to be done under all conditions, you have the willingness to try harder, you are friendly and open to networking with others, etc.

 

• Read motivational books about great leaders or the previously disadvantaged who made a success in their lives i.e. Helen Keller, Nelson Mandela, Josephine Baker, Victor Frankl, Oprah Winfrey, etc.

 

• Follow the directions for ‘Making Decisions’.